I’ve Been Robbed!$&!

Yes, someone stole my material. And I can’t help but smile. I know most of my postings are deep and insightful. So insightful. And just like Kleenex, part of the everyday vernacular. I mean when a blogue title is ‘Got Nipples?’ who could pass that up? #january11,2019. It was pretty funny. I just went back and read it again and it made me laugh. No one enjoys my writing as much as I do. Except my millions of followers. Anyway, I’m watching this Sunday morning news show which is really the best thing going on TV these days. I know I will probably get some backlash from that statement, but I don’t really like to binge, stream, Huluhoop, or get into all the different ways to get entertainment . I used air quotes on that last word so join in if you’d like. I guess because I am so insightful and deep, so deep, that my attention span atrophies. My Sunday morning show does have a huge flaw that makes me sad. The commercials are for old people. Not us happening Boomlennials, of course. I can’t relate, yet, to every disease and the drugs that will make them tolerable. Does putting a flower on a disposable, adult diaper really make them sexy? I hate to think that someday I’ll be saying yes yes I must get those oh-so-fashionable, hot undergarments. Ugh. Anyway, back to nipples. And milk. The show snatched my material. And jokes. And made them sound boring and predictable. The dairy business is having a hard time surviving because all the fake ‘milks’ are taking over the market. And of course these drinks have no similarities to real milk, from animals, with nipples, but the public doesn’t really care. My doctor told me a couple years ago that people should not drink cow’s milk because the only purpose is to make calves fat. He neglected to also say strong and healthy. Two years later the doctor told me the same thing again and I informed him that martinis make people fat. He said one martini is fine. Amateur. Man needs new material if that’s all he’s got. Bottom line, my show stole my material. My brilliant material. And made it boring. Impossible.