Karenoia

I am a Karen. I mean, no, I am not a Karen. Well, I am a Karen, from the NancyDeniseSusieKathyDebbieDarleneBarbarahohum era. But, I am not A Karen, and I just don’t get it. Let me make this perfectly clear, (which is what every politician keeps saying as they make a terribly unclear statement), I don’t do those things. Whatever those ‘things’ are. It took me awhile to even figure out why everyone was using my name. Flattered, of course, but confused. Just thought my millions of followers were finally catching on. But as I heard it used more and more, I had to go right to the source. (Please don’t go. So not true.). What really took me aback (rightly so, not Karenly so), was they said ‘in the United States and other English speaking countries’. Hmmmm. I’m a world-wide phenomenon??? Now I am intrigued. And do kind of feel entitled. Maybe I don’t get all huffy and want to speak to the manager, but if the manager is good, he should want to speak to me. And you. The Boomlennial has put up with a lot of sh*t over the years. We’ve all had poor service, been ridiculed, discriminated against, laughed at by friend(?) and foe, and generally smiled and had a stiff upper lip as we were taught. Don’t rock the boat. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. Don’t call in sick. Ever. Just weird things. So now I really have Karenoia. Most of the insinuations are pretty bad, but I’ll just overlook those in true Karen fashion. And pick and choose what I want to be a positive. If I finally have a ‘world-wide’ label, I might as well put lipstick on it. And feathers. And wonder why there are two birds in the bush but I should be happy with one. And remember I don’t even like birds, even hummingbirds. They look like big bugs. So now there are three birds in the bush. Geesh. Just too confusing. Need a name change. #youroyalhighness