Halloween season has left me terrified this year, mainly because I didn’t know there was such a thing. Spooky it is brrrr. I understand the seasons by what candy assaults me when I walk into the grocery store. If it’s red and green, Christmas. Day after, only red hearts for Valentines Day. February fifteenth, pastel eggs. Summer does get confusing with all those horrible colorful fruits vying for attention. Help help! I don’t know if it’s July 4th or berry season. What to do? What to do? But now, October has become a mess of people and happenings and I don’t like it. No more driving to the country on a crisp, fall day to get a pumpkin and apples. There’s cars! And people! And festivals. Even the Amish have a huge event where they pretend they are just going about their business of living a simple life. Except that they are selling pies and ice cream and exhibiting exotic animals with broken feet and too many horns. Cluster f*ck. You can pay twenty bucks to ride on a wagon into the pristine woods. After you stand in line for two hours. Just like a normal day. And these ‘festivals’ are everywhere. You get sucked in and then it’s a thing. A Must Do to celebrate the season. Halloween is no longer one evening where kids dress up in costumes and winter coats to slog through the rain getting candy their parents won’t let them eat. Now the locusts are eating. Which is a reference to a Bible story I don’t remember but has to do with making up for unprofitable years. Or something maybe totally unrelated but I thought of it as I enjoyed my homemade Amish pie and ice cream looking at the clothes hanging out on the line to dry. I would think the dust kicked up by hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of cars might get them a bit dirty but that’s just me. I need more elbow room. Too many people bastardizing my autumn. Can’t wait to see what November brings. Thanksgiving was always one day. No presents to buy, stretch pants to wear, family to endure. And then poof. Done and done. Thankful that nothing more was expected of me. I will not venture to the candy aisle. Yet.