to be very boring. As much as I’d like to skip this conversation all together, just not possible. It’s been bothering my a$$ off, and probably yours, too. Pull, wave, wand, over, under, push, flap about. And that’s just to dry my hands. Figuring out the inner workings of the piss-pot is a whole different set of who-done-its. Do you push a lever to flush? Do you stand up and whistle? Does it flush by himself, and sometimes while you’re still relaxing? Way too much thought. The fancier the bathroom, the more inconvenient the amenities seem to be. I was at very sheshe resort with stunning bathrooms and lovely smelling soap. Which was a good thing, because I lathered up heavily to get my money’s worth. Alas, no amount of waving up/down, backwards/forward, in/out, headstand was going to bring water out of that gorgeous sink. And of course there would never be anything so gauche as a paper towel around, not that I would have figured out how to extradite it from its holder. Yes, big word for a very frustrating process. The very prolific author Lee Childs said, “If you’re writing yourself down a blind alley, make your hero work harder to get himself out. Life is not supposed to be easy.” I disagree! Maybe it makes for good fiction writing, but life should be easy, right? Or it would always be a big pile of poop, hence more bathroom confusion. I would just like a universal bathroom. One standard for the flush, one for the blow dry or paper towel extradition. (Gosh I love that word). There must be ‘best practices’ that all bathrooms should adopt. Just sayin. I really don’t want to think that much about it. And now I have truly bored myself, which is hard to do since I am endlessly fascinating. “If you would not be forgotten, as soon as you are dead and rotten, either write things worth reading, or do things worth the writing”. – Benjamin Franklin. Sadly, this post is worth the goldfish flush. Whoosh.