Now that the Oympics are winding down I realize it’s evolved into the Hunger Games with better clothes. These are supposedly the finest athletes our countries can muster, but they spend more time flopping around on the ground then being fancy. Ice skating used to be a beautiful sport with those flowing gossamer dresses and little tutus I would lust after knowing only my Barbie doll would ever be able to wear. Now I watch them bumping around on the ice while wanting to rub my rear thinking how much that must hurt. It’s great you can land a triple or fourple jump five percent of the time but the odds really aren’t in your favor. You look like an amateur with your fingers crossed. Just not entertaining. Give me better odds or a heads up so I can shut my eyes and not just cringe. I bruise easily. As one of my dearests once said “fat people bruise more easily”. And he knew immediately that was probably not a good choice of words, but probably pretty accurate. The back peddling and trying to explain that one away was actually quite funny because there is no pink diamond big enough for redemption #KobeBryant. Which would also explain why those tiny ladies skating aren’t covered. Just not enough adipose tissue to use all those glorious box of 64 colors. Magenta! Midnight blue! Salamander! Of course their flesh colored tights probably hide a lot of secrets. Other sports suffer, too. Great ski jumping! Until they miss. Then the commentators expound about how tough they are because they’ve had dozens of surgeries and broken bones but still want to compete. Helmet not doing its job. The doping. In Curling. Really?? How weak must you be to need That enhancement. Swish that broom! Harder!! Faster!! And now I need a cigarette….